Hardships of Men Who Like Men

by: jansen

hindi ko ginusto na maging ganito ako... nung elementary naman ako e lahat mga lalaki ang mga kaibigan ko at syempre nagkaroon din me ng crush sa mga girls... nun sigurong lang mga grade six na ako nung mapansin ko na ang gwapo ng bagong lipat na klasmeyt namin... ang gwapo gwapo nya as in ... head turner kung baga... dun ko lang napansin na para yatang nagiging bakla ako kasi bakit ako nagkakagusto sa isang lalaki... i was in first year highschool nung una ako makaranas na makahawak ng isang titi... pinahawak sa akin ito ng kapit bahay namin habang nanood pa kami ng tv... medyo ninerbyos nga ako kasi baka mahalata ng mga kasama namin dahil marami kami... accidentally kasi na naipatong ko ung kamay ko sa harap nya... e nung naipatong ko na e hindi na nya ito pinakawalan... hinigpitan nya ito ng hawak.... yan ang una kong pagkamulat sa pagiging bakla.... pero masasabi ko na ang high school days ko e medyo dull kasi i havent really experienced having sex with any of the guy but i havent regret that i havent... it was in my ist year college that i had been that expose already to this world... may tinatawag kasi dito sa baguio na rainforest.... malapit un sa burnham park, actually, parang parte yata un ng burnham.... un ung pinupuntahan ng mga gay and bisexuals para makahanap ng makakasex where you need not to pay to have fun.... i've been going there since ist year college and early years of my second year college...aaminin ko, medyo marami rami rin akong nakasex dun... dun na mismo namin ginagawa sa park....... but then i started thinking about the possibilities na baka malaman ng parents ko ginagawa ko kaya kasi one time e may kakilala ako na nagpupunta rin dun... it made me feel paranoid knowing that there is someone who already had known the other side of me ... that is why i stoped going there.... then i had discovered a movie theater which caters to bisexual activities inside... it is there that i meet one who ben my partner.... but we didnt last for long.... next thing that i learned is chatting.. it where i met my next partner, which i can say i had loved him in a way....but then, it had came to a time where i wanted already to stop all these bad things that i am doing.... i wanted to go back to the lord and serve him... but then again as a nature of bi's and gays... di ko rin natiis and i go back into such.. but at least i know now how to control my self... with all the experiences that i have.. i can conclude that bi's o or gay relationship will not last forever.. there will come a time where in you are being teased to go with others...